NLP lessons: rapport
how our mind works
In this lesson you’ll become aware of how the mind works. Then, you’ll be introduced to a science that is comparable to subatomic physics, NLP-3, which will provide you with the necessary tools to actively work on your mind. Becoming your own future programmer—a neurolinguistic programming master—steering yourself towards the goals you most desire.
You will discover the role of nlp hypnosis and self-hypnosis as keys to release your mind from all those obstacles that lock it into a neverending pit of depression, anxiety, frustrations and phobias. Finally, you’ll be able to understand how you and the people whom you live with interact with each other and how it is possible to recognize with NLP which communication channel a person draws-on when carrying out any type of activity.
the microcosm of the mind
Our daily life is always full of both controllable and uncontrollable events. We often superficially believe that we can control all our activities. When something happens which is outside our range of control and beyond our reach, we consider it as fate. Logics—the pillar of western society—is capable to explain many things, yet that which is inexplicable we don’t even consider it and we just relate it to chance. We see our lives as being completely under our rational control, rejecting all those things that are made up of impulsiveness and irrationality. But how can impulsiveness and irrationality destroy our life if we claim, with logics, to be able to dominate it? Perhaps there is something wrong, something that escapes our rational control, which is more important than we like to think.
NLP & brain hemispheres
At this point it is time to clarify something: our brain consists of two hemispheres located in the right and left part of the cerebral organ. The left hemisphere is responsible for logical reasoning, articulation and mathematics and follows sequential patterns; the right hemisphere, on the other hand, is responsible for emotions, dreams, creativity and irrational cognitions and its here that our mental programs are stored. But what is a mental program? Mental-programs are the subject matter of NLP, that is why nlp stands for neurolinguistic programming.
NLP sensory phases
When we are born, our mind doesn’t have any type of conditioning, our brain is free from externally generated influences, so it behaves without any fixed plans—this being the state of affairs even though in the womb our mother’s emotions did have some influence on our emotional state. When we come into the world we don’t make any distinction between positive and negative, we find ourselves in a Sensory Phase in which we feel pleasure and pain, joy and unhappiness but we are unable to define them. For example, a baby puts his finger in an electricity socket and feels the pain, yet is unable to define it.
Then we pass through a Perceptive Phase in which we know what pleasure and pain are but are unable to identify the source from where they come from. For example the baby puts his finger in the socket, feels and defines the pain he experiences, yet he can’t identify its source.
Finally, we pass through a Reflective Phase in which we can identify good and bad sources. In fact, we think of any type of food as being either pleasant or unpleasant, without ever having tasted it before, just by looking at the expression of delight or disgust on our mother’s face when she tries to encourage us to eat it. Our taste is not yet developed, but we are able to decode a series of non-verbal messages from those near us. Our mind can be compared to a clean slate, a tabula rasa, which gets written-on step by step as our parents provide us with the information. As children we absorb and store information like sponges, forming a mental program within our first three years of life and improving it up to the age of twelve. This slate is the repository of those deeply rooted beliefs that often and willingly limit our success in life. NLP-3 is in great measure a beliefs-system-oriented science.
NLP & self-fulfilling prophecies
If, since young age, my mother kept telling me I was an idiot, this statement will be imprinted in my unconscious mind in such a way as to make me behave like an idiot throughout my childhood and manhood, even though this will make me suffer. This hidden program will be beyond my awareness and the only explanation that I’ll be able to give myself will be that I actually am an idiot!
At this point, following the conventions of western civilization, the question is: Is it logical to think of ourselves as idiots when we believe we can control everything with rational thought? Why do we sometimes blush without any visible reason when faced by certain people or circumstances? Why do we sink into depression or are not able to reach our goals if we have everything we need?
Perhaps the reason is that our unconscious has the power to exert control over our life, its control-share being over 90% against only the 10% allotted to the rational side. We can compare the unconscious to a huge elephant wandering in a dense jungle: there is a fly on its back that represents the elephant’s rational side, which tells it: “Hey, go straight ahead in that direction ’cos I’ve seen a mountain of sugar!”
However, the elephant comes across a stream, which suddenly reminds it of hi thirstiness, so it starts to walk towards the stream to quench its thirst. The fly can shout as much as it wants, but it is never going to change the elephant’s decision to head toward the wather instead of going ahead as commanded.
How many times has a similar situation occured to us? How many times have we rationally planned goals that we have not been able to achieve? Have we asked the elephant what its needs are?